Pooped out of ideas

The family is still trying to sort this all out. No, not the President's speech last night. It's the whole diet thing!

I'm a delicate eater. I nibble. I crunch. I sit down and take a break before my bowl ever becomes empty.

Mauly is different. She inhales her food in seconds every morning. Her bowl is clean before Mom or Mr. Food Boy can turn their backs on her.

Mauly is the only one in the family, who believes she is starving. If I have an accident in the house, she will clean it up. And, I really mean eat it up. Mom's been on a mission in recent days to investigate ways to correct this behavior. Mr. Food Boy suggests that if Mom would correct my behavior -- make sure I go outside, then there wouldn't be an issue.

Mom happily points out to Mr. Food Boy that those crunching noises from the yard are Mauly and me eating dried poop. While Mom and Mr. Food Boy pick up ours, there are all types of animals that appear in the yard under the cloak of darkness. I agree it would be difficult for them to pick up all of this poop. That's where Mauly and me get to work.

I don't really know how Mom will resolve this issue. One online article suggested splitting up our feeding. Instead of giving us food only in the morning, Mom and Mr. Food Boy are splitting up our daily rations into a morning and evening serving.

One TV show offered pineapple as a solution to this problem. It apparently makes the poop taste icky. But, I wonder (primarily, because my food will be spiced with it) how it will make the food taste I eat? I might not want to eat my food with pineapple chunks.

And, this is a bigger issue? Just like the president has to look at the full picture on this financial crisis, so do Mom and Mr. Food Boy? Mauly and Me aren't the only ones dropping things in the yard. Can they feed pineapple to the deer, cats and possible javelina, skunk and coyote that hang out around our house?

I don't think so. I'm glad it's them that have to worry about this stuff and not me.